i stepped on the scale today and it said “bat”
it took me a few seconds to realize it meant the battery was out, but before i realized that i just said “i am not a bat” out loud
so, today this girl in my class asked what the word procrastination meant and i said ‘can i explain that later?’ and my teacher laughed for like five minutes and when he stopped the girl whispered ’ i don’t get it’
my brother is 21 years old and a chef in a 5 star restaurant and he still has dinosaur shaped chicken nuggets for dinner every night so dont let anybody tell you how to live your life
if you just walked into a club and the floor was super slippery and people had strapped knives to their feet and were jumping around you’d be like “holy shit, i don’t know if this is the environment for me” and yet skating is a thing
A close up shot of Captain America’s shield
That actually explains so much.
Men of Tumblr, I’m counting on you to make this one good.
I got stuck
Please, nothing to it.
Yes it got better finally
Let’s try this….
I feel dumb
so far so good…
And done! you know I thought there would be some kind of white girl change but this is very uneventful… I fell funny..
What…. is that jewelry??? AND A HEADBAND???
GUYS IT’S A TRAP
if a girl poisons you with japanese food what should you do
Actually I believe the correct grammar is “Sue her.”
“She” is a subject pronoun, so “her” is needed for the objective part of the sentence.
i’m glad the shit that lives in the ocean lacks the ability to leave the ocean because most of it is scary as fuck